The Support of Others after Separation

If you're a sandwiched boomer who is recently separated, you now have even more on your plate. But the support of those you've taken care of can now care for you. And that can make a world of difference.

This is a time for new beginnings. In the past, you may have repeated rituals together with your partner and as a family – weekend barbeques, annual vacations or holidays with relatives from both sides. But now it will be different. Keep your expectations realistic and continue the routines that are familiar and important. At the same time, experiment about how to make special times with family and friends meaningful in new ways.

Make room for you in quiet moments by yourself or with close friends. Accept that you may feel fragile, perhaps anxious or even depressed. Recognize that this is normal for what you're going through. Give up resentments and find meaning in the life you are now building. Get caught up in the anticipation of this new chapter.

Realize there will be difficult firsts and you don't have to do it all alone. If money or time is an issue, keep your lives as simple as possible and engage the support of others. Being together with those who love you is most important. So don't hesitate to let family or friends help out, and include both sets of your children's grandparents. It's important for the kids to know that they still have the love of an extended family.

Want more guidance through these rough waters? Click on the title of this post and read some of our Her Mentor Center articles, posted on Divorce360.com, a website packed with practical information and tips.