Yesterday came the official word about what families have sensed for a while - Americans are in the midst of a recession, potentially the worst since the Great Depression. Many people who are normally calm are stressed by the financial meltdown and concerned that they are spiraling out of control. If this sounds familiar, you could be emotionally at risk for harming your children, your spouse or elders under your care. If you are worried about your hostile attitude and aggressive behavior - be it verbal abuse or physical - begin to address your own fragility by following the suggestions we will be providing this week. Today we begin with one:

Work with a therapist to develop anger management skills and techniques for dealing with disappointment. Within the protective environment of a professional's office, you can share your hostile feelings, express your anger and then learn how to keep your aggression in check. As you improve communication, using words instead of physicality, you will feel more competent and in control. Psychological sessions will also lead you to insight, and the opportunity to understand the underlying roots of your negative emotions and behavior.

Tomorrow we will introduce additional aids to help you and other Sandwiched Boomers deal with your reactions during these trying times.

I recently returned from a three week trip to China and had the chance to talk to some women about their Sandwich Generation concerns. I was particularly aware of the strong movement away from an agrarian society toward rapid urban growth. Our local "boomer" guides were proud of incorporating Western values into their lifestyle - with more demanding work schedules, higher cost of living and increased stress levels.

There, grandparents are well respected and taken care of - many living in the home of one of their sons and his family. And they play an intregal role in the family structure, often caring for their young grandchildren whose parents are working very long hours.

Yet these elders also nurture themselves - in the early morning hours at any local park, you can find any number of activities very well attended: tai chi, ballroom dancing, exercises, drumming, mahjong, walking, Chinese checkers.

I wonder, should we be adopting some of the ways that the Chinese treat the aging process? Is there a lesson in all this for us?