Maureen Hancock, The Medium Next Door

We want to welcome Maureen Hancock to our Virtual Book Tour today. She's here to talk about her book, The Medium Next Door: Adventures of a Real-Life Ghost Whisperer. Maureen has lots to tell us about her unusual vocation so let's not waste any time getting started:

NR: You have a new book out. What's the book about and where can readers get it?

MH: My new book, The Medium Next Door is about the adventures of a real life ghost whisperer. It's basically part memoir about my life as a medium. I'm just like your next door neighbor…only I hear and see dead people. I write about my work with the sick and dying, helping people pass, assisting detectives to help find missing children and adults and some profound readings that have changed families' lives each chapter has a reflection or suggestions to apply to your own life for healing and knowledge. You can get the book at Amazon or from my website, www.maureenhancock.com

NR: You are truly, “The Medium Next Door.” You’re a wife, mother of two young boys—a soccer mom with a twist. How do you explain what you do to your children and how do you balance family life with the demands of your work?

MH: My children are very open to spirit and the work I do. When they were younger, they couldn't understand why I left the house with amplifiers and microphones to do shows. When my younger son was six, his teacher asked each of the students what their mother did for a living. My son proudly explained, "My mother's a rock star." Now, we talk openly about spirits and their guardian angel in heaven - their cousin, Sean.

NR: How did you first realize you had the ability to communicate with the dearly departed?

MH: As a child, I had lead paint poisoning and was in a coma. I spent three years in and out of Boston's Children's Hospital. When I came home from the hospital at the age of five, I could see spirits roaming around my house. One of my sisters said they would take me back to the hospital if I kept talking about "the invisible people," so I shut it off. Cut to 1992, I fell asleep at the wheel and broke several bones in my face, including a fractured skull. After the accident, I didn't need any surgery and I believe my recently deceased grandmother was watching over me. I then started to hear voices from beyond while volunteering with cancer patients.

NR: You are a former stand-up comedienne (sometimes referred to as the "Comedian Medium") how do you incorporate humor with such a heavy subject matter?

MH: I think what differentiates me from many other spirit mediums is that I believe our loved ones in spirit enjoy coming through with a celebration of life and not reliving another wake. Being a former stand-up comic, I enjoyed making people smile and forget about their daily stress and heartache. When I bring through a spirit, often times the validations are so on point (names, dates, exact way of passing) the person loses it and starts to weep, sometimes uncontrollably. It is at this exact point of the reading that I jump in with humor and help the person left behind know that it's okay to continue living, laughing and celebrating these great memories. After all, laughter is the best medicine.

NR: You are co-founder of two charities. Tell us about them.

MH: "Seeds of Hope" is a foundation that provides support for those suffering with debilitating and terminal illnesses. We provide holistic healing support such as massage, Reiki hands on healing, reflexology and mediation. I help clients with their fears of death and help them pass with less pain and fear. We also support parents who have lost children through support groups and private sessions. This work is all offered free of charge.

My other non-profit is "Mission for the Missing." It was co-founded with a private detective two years ago. We offer help to families of children and adults who are missing and/or murdered. The detective is a ground-search coordinator and together we facilitate large-scale searches incorporating the efforts of many volunteer teams such as cadaver dogs, divers, horses, atv's, Fish and Game, State Police, ground searchers and more. We also offer training scholarships to dogs for continuing education, as well as equipment needed from all over the country for assistance.

NR: Obviously many people are skeptical about what you do. How do you handle the skeptics?

MH: I'm a former skeptic. I refused to go to psychics when my friends would try to get me to go to tarot cards or tea leave readings. It's not my job to convince anyone I can deliver the info and let them process it and decide for themselves. I've turned many skeptics into believers by giving very detailed information. My job is to deliver detailed information and hopefully, plant the seed of hope.

NR: Tell us about your upcoming television show. What do you hope to achieve by being on TV?

MH: I'm so excited about the TV show. I have an outstanding team of producers, Sander & Moses who executive produced the Ghost Whisperer, as well as some great producers from ABC Medial Productions and Disney. I'm traveling around the country, stopping in small towns offering my assistance with a variety of "matters" such as assisting detectives on missing person cases, helping a family who has lost a child, helping people to understand death and using my humor to deliver impromptu readings all over town.

NR: Thanks for joining us today, Maureen. Now the blog is open to our readers - ask your own questions about Maureen's book and TV show through the comment link below.

Sally Shields is Launching Her Book

Sally Shields is an Internet dynamo and an astute businesswoman. She's also incredibly generous and a great role model for how to give back to others while moving toward your own goals.

Today we're joining with 50 relationship experts and success coaches to help Sally, a best selling author, reach her goal - #1 on Amazon.

Sally is offering a valuable bundle of gifts - free dieting and self-improvement eBooks as well as discounts on fitness magazines and custom jewelry for women who buy her new book, Is She Naturally Thin or Disciplined? Find out about this unique offer by visiting the book launch site.

If you're a card carrying member of the Sandwich Generation, facing the challenges of parents growing older and kids growing up, stress is a given. And with little time for yourself, healthy eating and exercise can take a back seat. Sally's book focuses on first person accounts of women who have found some answers for themselves.

And sign our email list to the left of this post to receive Stepping Stones, our complimentary monthly newsletter.

Dr. Carol Orsborn Responds to Sandwiched Boomers

Our thanks to all you sandwiched boomers who tuned in yesterday to take part in our interview with Dr. Carol Orsborn. We had a spirited discussion about "The Year I Saved My (downsized) Soul."

Clicking on the title of this post will take you to Amazon and you can learn more about "The Year I Saved My (downsized) Soul." Our thanks to Carol for being so generous with her time. You can still read all of the responses, in full, through yesterday's "comments" link at the bottom of the post. Here's a sampling:

One reader asks: I agree with what you say about how sharing can make you feel less alone. I lost my job six months ago but I'm not talking. Where do I begin?

Carol's response: First of all, I emphathize with you and all the many of us who have gone through the "downsized" experience. In addition to whatever in-person resources your community may offer, many women 50+ are finding relief in being able to share their experiences online. There are a number of websites (check around) but I do a lot of my venting on a wide range of topics at VibrantNation.com. You can come on the site anonymous or use your real name. In either case, I think you'll find it rewarding to discover what a relief it is to be able to speak your mind to like-minded women. (I think you'll find that you'll find yourself in some rich conversations--and it's free and easy to get started, 24/7. Good luck!)

Catherine wonders: You mention that you've never written such a personal book before. What have been the after effects of, as you say, "exposing" yourself?

Carol's answer: You ask about the effects of exposing myself in a memoir. Well, I braced myself for huge negative ramifications and then nothing bad happened. Of course, I did back way off my first draft that read more like "The Devil Wears Prada", overshadowing the spiritual heart of the book that was really the point--so I did edit back a lot. In fact, I edited out 100 pages! That said, a friend of mine did a memoir about her relationship with family members and doesn't speak to any of them any more--so you never know. My suggestion to all memorists is first write it for catharsis fearlessly, then upon rewrite, remove anything that doesn't advance the story and that is either vindictive or therapy.

Another reader reflects: I've heard from friends that journaling is helpful. I've made a few attempts but don't stay with it. Any hints?

Carol's thoughtful reply: I try to journal every day, especially when I'm working through an issue or feeling generally "off", and yes, it helps me a lot! In fact, my book grew out of my daily journals, as you know. How to keep at it? My first advice is to not overthink it. Assume nobody will ever read it and don't worry about spelling, grammar or even making sense. In fact, you might try capturing stream of consciousness: just write whatever's in your mind, i.e. jump from the fact that you're upset to that you need to buy toilet paper--again, without judgement. Eventually, if journaling is going to become "your thing", it will start surfacing deeper wisdom/self-knowledge and clarity. If it doesn't, just might not be your best tool. For me personally, I'm kind of "worded" out so I'm going to start doing a visual journal, where I draw abstract (or whatever) with colored pencils to capture my mood. I'll report back at some point if this worked!

Another reader is searching for direction: I just found out that my company has been bought out and after the holidays I won't have a job. Carol, what's your best tip about keeping up your spirits, especially at this time?

Carol reassures her: First, my condolences regarding finding out you're going to be unemployed--esp. difficult when through no fault of your own. Even if like most of us, you are tempted to take some level of responsibility...that's my first advice, don't take that on! Let yourself be sad/angry or anything other than turning against yourself. Secondly, that's a big question about how to keep your spirits up. I'd like to direct you to the four-part series I just completed for www.VibrantNation.com. You'll see me and parts three and four on our home page, but if you start there, you will easily be led to parts one and two and can read the series in order. Best of luck!

Jan has an often asked question: A lot of women talk about the void - I can't remember the author's name but she writes for boomer women and coined the term. What do you mean by it?

Carol here: Hi Jan, I've been using the term "void" for twenty years--but don't take responsibility for coining it, as I'm pretty sure it's a literal translation of a Buddhist term. In any case, the way I use it is to describe that uncertain place between status quo's, where you are in transition but to you, it feels like you've fallen into utter darkness and hopelessness. In Christianity, they refer to this place as being akin to "the dark night of the soul." Almost every spiritual tradition has something similar.

Cassidy writes: this may be a silly question but how did your spirituality help you during the time you felt so low? i'm going through a divorce and i can't seem to find myself. cassidy

Carol shares an improtant lesson: Hi Cassidy, The point about spirituality is that we all believe in something. The philosopher William James says that believing things are going to be alright in the long run (i.e. that this is a loving universe) helps in the same way that the attitudes of two mountain climbers who have to jump a crevice will make a difference. Who will have the better chance of making it across? The one who thinks it's impossible or the one who thinks if he/she tries hard enough, she'll make it? People who are "spiritual" examine their beliefs and if they discover that they believe they're "on their own", take the leap of faith of believing there's a power greater than themselves that actively cares about them--even if it doesn't seem so at the time. The thing is, they call it an act of faith exactly because you don't know for certain...One final thought, I have found that the very impulse to pray--the willingness to give it a try--is what God responds to, not the choice or eloquence of the words or even the certainty of belief.

Carol's final words: It's the end of the day and I'm going to be signing off now. Thanks for all who checked this out--and especially those who posted comments. Thanks so much to Phyllis and Rosemary for hosting me. If you'd like to stay in the loop with my perspective/thoughts, I Tweet as Carol Orsborn; and of course, you are welcome to stay in touch with me and our community of women 50+ at www.VibrantNation.com.

Well, that's it for now. If you want a break from holiday shopping, visit our website by clicking on the first link to the left of this post, "Her Mentor Center." You'll find lots of tips about the family in both the 'Newsletter Library' and 'Nourishing Relationships.' And you can sign up for our newsletter, Stepping Stones, by clicking on the second link marked "FREE Newsletter."