Family Relationships

Join other women in the sandwich generation - share ideas and solutions as you learn to nourish family relationships without starving yourself.

Wednesday, January 06, 2010

Being Resilient after January Blues

Three senior women in garden looking at laptop screen, smiling

Just as Janus, the Roman god of doorways, had two faces, one looking back and one forward, you too have the ability to make choices for your future, using the wisdom you have gained in your past.

Draw on your strengths. What worked for you before when you were feeling miserable? What core values served as your guide as you coped with frustrations and disappointments? Use these again as you face challenges in January and watch your resiliency come to the forefront. Don't hesitate to call upon the resources that are there for you.

Notice the control you do have over how you feel. When you change your thoughts from negative to positive ones, see how your emotions change. Make a decision to spend less time worrying and more counting your blessings. Instead of holding on to the family conflict that boiled up over the holidays, let go of your resentments and anger. When you begin to forgive, you stop feeling sorry for yourself and become more optimistic.

Identify activities that serve to reduce the stresses in your life - then include them in your schedule. If you're a Sandwiched Boomer, these can range from arranging for someone to help you with childcare or eldercare responsibilities to setting aside some time to sit down and listen to music, read a good book or just do some deep breathing. Get in touch with your spiritual connections for balance and grounding. When you are feeling relaxed and authentically free, you'll be better able to cope with the hassles you face this winter.

Get support from your family and friends. It was easier to connect during the holiday season, but make an effort to follow-up with your social network in January. Share your concerns with them and see if you gain a fresh viewpoint or validate your feelings. New support and discussion groups generally begin after the New Year and classes at local community colleges do as well. Reach out and join to gain insight and perspective. And don't forget to spend some time with friends just for the plain fun of it - laughter is a great tension reliever.

To read more tips on creating a positive outlook, even during the month of January, click on the post title above. It links you to our website, and our article, How Boomers Can Sing Rock and Roll Instead of the Blues.

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