Sandwiched Boomers: Gift of Health

Americans are very busy spending lots of money on gift cards. With the holidays now right around the corner, your stress level may be stuck on high. And if that's so, a medical gift card, which some credit card companies and health care providers issue, could be exactly what the doctor ordered.

Photo courtesy of Shoshana - Flickr.com

The targeted audience for these medical gift cards are members of the Sandwich Generation. They're the ones buying presents for parents who have increasing health needs. They're also looking to gift their kidults, who are concerned about fitness and in college or living on their own. This gift can be used toward a variety of health related services – prescription co-pays, medical or dental visits, contact lenses, even some wellness programs, elective surgery and gym memberships.

We know you're probably trying to maintain a life in balance while still honoring the complexity of the holiday season. See if you can figure out what means the most to you. Then make a decision to focus on what you want to do, not on what you have to do. Let this time of year be a major step toward taking care of your own needs. As you begin to lay the groundwork for change in your gift giving rituals, treat yourself to better health by keeping your stress in check. Log on here tomorrow - we'll have some tips about taking care of you during the holiday season.

Did your holiday celebration begin last night with lighting the first candle, eating latkes, playing games and opening gifts? If so, we wish a Happy Hanukah to all of you!

Sandwiched Boomers and the Gift of Time

As a Sandwiched Boomer caring for parents growing older and kids growing up, perhaps you're feeling under more pressure this week. The days are flying by and there's still so much to do for the holidays. And you may not be finished shopping for your Hanukah, Christmas or Kwanzaa presents. How about a few more ideas that won't break the bank?

Photo by Brainedge - Flickr.com

Give of yourself. Enjoy time with your friends by inviting them over for an evening of fun. Organize a potluck and have them bring their signature dish. Cut down on expenses by exchanging memories instead of presents. Or express yourself and create some of your holiday gift items. Make a coupon book filled with orders for good deeds. Add a personal touch by baking and decorating cookies with the kids. Show others you care with an IOU to babysit so they can have a much needed night out.

Give to yourself. Take some down time over the holidays and get comfortable with you. For a couple of hours each day, try not to focus on your problems. Curl up with a great book from the library, watch the ballgame with your teens or take your grandkids to the park. Enjoy peace of mind by paying down your debts. Hold back from buying lots of gifts or taking the family on an expensive outing. Decide together how to spend a fun and relaxing day. Your family will understand and grow from the experience.

The holidays don't always have to look like a Norman Rockwell painting.

You create more stress if you stick only to old routines and traditions. Try not to operate on automatic pilot. Begin to lay the groundwork for change in your gift giving rituals. As you can see, it doesn't have to cost you anything but time. And when money is tight and life is challenging, connection and support can mean the most.

It will be a gift to yourself when you recreate the joy of simpler days. Small changes can represent a new beginning. Take heart as you give a little that feels like a lot. And in these hard times, that's a good lesson for all of us.

Caring for Yourself and Aging Parents at Holiday Time

Amidst all the celebrating during these holidays, if you're a Sandwiched Boomer, torn between caring for growing children and aging parents, you may be bogged down by your responsibilities and having a hard time getting into the spirit of the season. I know I did when I was taking care of my parents a decade ago. They moved in with me after my mother developed cognitive impairment due to a stroke, and they lived with us until their deaths years later. When I was just too exhausted, my husband insisted we get help and that made a huge difference in all of our lives.

Image: Ambro / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

While you're busy caring for others, remember to take good care of yourself too. Make time for fun and take advantage of free time you set aside for yourself. You can nurture yourself even when you're focused on nourishing others. Remember what Ben Franklin said about how to keep yourself young: We do not stop playing because we grow old, We grow old because we stop playing!

If you're a Sandwiched Boomer, we've got some resources to help you take better care of yourself, manage daily hassles and reduce long-term stress. Use them to create some energy so you can enjoy the holidays this year.

AARP recently hosted an event focused on identifying what can be done to support caregivers, bringing together 10 authors - including Gail Sheehy and Walter Mosley - who have hands on experience themselves caring for loved ones. You can view the archived webcast of the event on the AARP website.

If you're caring for a loved one at home, find out about respite care options and caregiver resources that will give you the break you need. You may want to consult the Private Duty Homecare Association, which is devoted to overcoming the challenges of aging in place. And you can a look at their past webinars on various aspects of at-home care, which may help your loved one maintain a sense of independence and feelings of security. Home Instead Senior Care can also help overcome obstacles in assisting your loved one's aging in place, including gift ideas for the holidays.

When you feel you are no longer able to care for a loved one by yourself, you may begin looking for other options. Assisted Living Today has compiled a series of articles to help determine the best type of care for your loved one. Especially helpful is the information in their Assisted Living Care Guide. For those of you who have a parent with Alzheimer's or other dementia their Memory Care Guide provides facts about different types of facilities caring for those with Alzheimer's Disease as well as questions and answers to help you make decisions about caring for your loved one.

November was Alzheimer's Awareness month, bringing attention to the estimated 5 million who suffer from this disease. The Alzheimer's Association provides information and support to those with Alzheimer's as well as for their caregivers.

If you want to read more about eldership, AgeSong features Dr. Nader Shabahangi who has been writing about the aging process and the need for community to ensure a positive outlook - for caregivers as well as their loved ones. You may find his white papers interesting and informative, especially if you're caring for a loved one.

Treat yourself to an important holiday gift this year - your decision to take good care of yourself even with the pull of your aging parents and growing children. You deserve it.

The Holidays and the Gift of Time

We invite you to visit our website, HerMentorCenter.com. The articles, newsletters and videos you'll discover there are full of easy to implement strategies for you, members of the sandwich generation facing the challenges of parents growing older and kids growing up.

Please accept this gift from us - join the email list to the left of this post and begin to receive a free monthly newsletter with practical solutions to the problems of a family in flux. And you can also download a complimentary ebook on how to reach your goals.

Happy Holidays to you and yours!
Phyllis and Rosemary

As the meltdown in the economy and the crisis in confidence continue, are you still feeling stretched by the financial pressure? The responsibilities of the holiday season may be getting you down, especially if you're facing tough buying decisions. These are challenging times. This year, in more ways than one, you may just have to let go of the idea of a perfect Christmas, Hanukah or Kwanzaa.

Even though it's important to honor the tradition of giving, accumulating material things can't hold a candle to the gift that matters most. Bringing cheer to others can cheer you up as well. And you can do it without breaking the bank. With the holidays fast approaching, you certainly don't want more pressure. So follow these practical tips as you focus on more joy and less stuff:

Give the gift of connection. Put heart in your relationships. Arrange a regular weekly date with your parents. Invite them out to lunch, a museum or the movies. Send a card to someone with whom you've lost contact. Enclose a recent family photo, your email address and a promise to keep in touch. Drive an elderly neighbor to the grocery store, a doctor's appointment or the shopping mall.

Give to a worthy cause. Get the family or a group of friends together and spend a couple of hours helping at a homeless shelter. Pass forward gifts you've never used. Or bring some toys or clothes that are in good shape. Buy a small present for a street person you pass regularly and make eye contact when you give it. Put a big smile on your face and help cook the holiday dinner at a soup kitchen. Make a donation to Aunt Sue's favorite charity; every gift counts no matter how much you spend.

Give of yourself. Enjoy time with your friends by inviting them over for an evening of fun. Organize a potluck dinner and have them bring their signature dish. Cut down on expenses by exchanging memories instead of presents. Or express yourself and create some of your holiday gift items. Make a coupon book filled with orders for good deeds. Add a personal touch by baking decorative cookies with the kids. Show others you care with an IOU to babysit so they can have a much needed night out.

Give to yourself. Take some down time over the holidays. For a couple of hours each day, try not to focus on your problems. Curl up with a great book from the library, watch the ballgame with your teenagers or take your grandkids to the park. Enjoy peace of mind by paying down your debts. Hold back from buying lots of gifts or taking the family on an expensive outing. Decide together how to spend a fun and relaxing day. Your family will understand and may grow from the experience.

The holidays don't always have to look like a Norman Rockwell painting. Begin to lay the groundwork for change in your gift giving rituals. As you can see, it doesn't have to cost you anything but time. And when money is tight and life is challenging, connection and support mean the most.

It will be a gift to yourself when you recreate the joy of simpler days. Small changes can represent a new beginning. Take heart as you give a little that feels like a lot. And in these hard times, that's a good lesson for all of us.

Reduce Family Stress during the Holidays

Although the pictures you see are of Christmas trees, presents and smiling faces, there's a lot of chatter about the pressures on families during the holidays. How do you make this season as stress free as possible?

Try to understand what about the holidays is most significant to you and your family. And then decide to focus on what you want to do, not what you think you have to do. Begin to lay the groundwork for change in your family rituals.

Find emotional support. With the challenges of college kids coming home, integrating in-laws into the family and caring for aging parents, take a breather and call a friend. Share your feelings about what's going on in your family - get it off your chest and get some positive feedback.

Gratitude is a powerful emotion. Use it to your advantage. Point out your family's positive qualities rather than focusing on the negatives. Tell your loved ones what they mean to you. See their reaction and notice how it makes you feel.

Perhaps you don't have role models for repairing the family and have to make it up as you go along. Trust yourself in this process. Often the messiness of emotions leads to better understanding. Conflict can serve as an invitation to grow when you honor the importance of relationships. With family, there are no returns or exchanges even with a gift receipt. So embrace the holiday season and rejoice in the love and support of family.

Why not buy yourself a gift that costs less than a cup of coffee? At HerMentorCenter.com, you'll find an ebook Taking Control of Stress in a Financial Storm: Practical Strategies and Resources for Success that's full of simple strategies that help reduce stress.

http://www.hermentorcenter.com/order.html

Getting Help for SAD and January Depression

If you've tried the tips we've been talking about this week and nothing seems to help, you may have Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) or a clinical depression. Consult your physician or a specialist in psychological disorders for constructive input about these conditions.

A diagnosis of SAD may be made when your mood, energy level and motivation are all down during the winter months. Several techniques can help you cope with this disorder: (1) get out into the sun, preferably for at least one hour per day of natural light; (2) keep your home window coverings open to the light and your office well lit; (3) if your symptoms continue, your physician may prescribe photo therapy with a special light, typically for an hour a day.

If your despair continues, or you have the signs and symptoms of clinical depression, see a psychologist or psychiatrist for evaluation and treatment. You will benefit from a professional's input as you learn to challenge your negative thoughts and gain skills to manage your feelings. Your doctor can discuss with you whether antidepressants will be of assistance in your treatment plan.

For more information about coping, click on the post title above to be linked to our website, www.HerMentorCenter.com and How to Manage Depression Short of Having Octuplets. And plan to stop by next week as we go over the steps for creating a set of realistic New Year's resolutions that you and other Sandwiched Boomers can achieve.

Optimize Your Opportunities after January Blues

Not only are we into a new month and a new year, but also into a new decade. What will the '10's bring for you? Now is the time to set the tone for this time in your life.

Turn crises into challenges and challenges into opportunities. Don't become overwhelmed. Instead, use this time to research things you want to do and changes you want to make. Remember that although you can't control what happens to you, you can control how you handle it. Think about the consequences of your decisions before you make a change. If you are unhappy with your current job, consider what you can do to make it more interesting and engaging.

Express gratitude for what you have. It may sound simple, but as you've heard many times, "Happiness is not having what you want, but wanting what you have." What are the things and people in your life that you are grateful for? You'll find that when you increase your awareness of these positives, you'll be less likely to experience feelings of hopelessness and helplessness.

Look outside yourself to those in need. Studies have found that when you perform acts of kindness and giving to those who have less, you feel happier yourself. Around the holidays numerous organizations sent out requests for financial donations but all year long they need volunteers to help staff their programs. Consider what best fits your interests, abilities and schedule - then make your contribution with your feet.

To cope with financial issues, make plans that won't further impact your budget or credit card debt. In the current recession, many families are enjoying activities such as potlucks with friends, visits to local museums, taking daylight walks, borrowing a good book from the library. Make it a game to be creative in your quest for low-cost entertainment.

For some pointers on how to encourage and express gratitude, click on the post title above. It links you to our article, Five Steps to Gratitude Despite a Tough Economy, found, among others helpful to Sandwiched Boomers, on our website, www.HerMentorCenter.com.

Being Resilient after January Blues

Just as Janus, the Roman god of doorways, had two faces, one looking back and one forward, you too have the ability to make choices for your future, using the wisdom you have gained in your past.

Draw on your strengths. What worked for you before when you were feeling miserable? What core values served as your guide as you coped with frustrations and disappointments? Use these again as you face challenges in January and watch your resiliency come to the forefront. Don't hesitate to call upon the resources that are there for you.

Notice the control you do have over how you feel. When you change your thoughts from negative to positive ones, see how your emotions change. Make a decision to spend less time worrying and more counting your blessings. Instead of holding on to the family conflict that boiled up over the holidays, let go of your resentments and anger. When you begin to forgive, you stop feeling sorry for yourself and become more optimistic.

Identify activities that serve to reduce the stresses in your life - then include them in your schedule. If you're a Sandwiched Boomer, these can range from arranging for someone to help you with childcare or eldercare responsibilities to setting aside some time to sit down and listen to music, read a good book or just do some deep breathing. Get in touch with your spiritual connections for balance and grounding. When you are feeling relaxed and authentically free, you'll be better able to cope with the hassles you face this winter.

Get support from your family and friends. It was easier to connect during the holiday season, but make an effort to follow-up with your social network in January. Share your concerns with them and see if you gain a fresh viewpoint or validate your feelings. New support and discussion groups generally begin after the New Year and classes at local community colleges do as well. Reach out and join to gain insight and perspective. And don't forget to spend some time with friends just for the plain fun of it - laughter is a great tension reliever.

To read more tips on creating a positive outlook, even during the month of January, click on the post title above. It links you to our website, www.HerMentorCenter.com and our article, How Boomers Can Sing Rock and Roll Instead of the Blues.

Take Care of Yourself after January Blues

Are you already experiencing winter blues and frustrated with yourself for not doing what you set out to do this year? Today we'll look at how to better take care of yourself in 2010 and next week, we'll give you more help in keeping your New Year's resolutions.

Begin with some honest self-reflection. What is currently disturbing you the most? What do you feel good about? Consider both your physical and emotional reactions. Once you are aware of the real problems, you can begin to identify possible solutions and map out a plan to implement them.

Be realistic in your expectations as you set New Year's resolutions you are likely to achieve and goals you can accomplish. You may need to scrap your original list and come up with less grandiose aspirations. Don't beat yourself up for falling short of promises you made to yourself that were out of your reach. Who hasn't made mistakes? Take it one day at a time as you revise and come up with a Plan B.

Commit to an exercise plan that you will continue. Physical activity can release endorphins, reducing your level of stress. Studies have shown that 30 minutes of brisk walking reduces depression for several hours. A regular exercise routine also plays a part in achieving weight reduction and better sleep patterns. If possible, include some outdoor daytime exercise to take advantage of the natural light outside.

Establish eating habits that incorporate nutritious foods in well-balanced meals. During the holiday season, women can gain an average of five to seven pounds. Now get back to a healthier diet and smaller portions. Leafy green vegetables with their high levels of folic acid and oily fish, with vitamin B-12 and omega-3 fatty acids can play roles in maintaining an upbeat mood. Foods such as Brazil nuts are rich in selenium, needed to produce serotonin.

And click on the post title above to read about Five Ways Sandwiched Boomers Can Think Positive in Tough Times on our website, www.HerMentorCenter.com.

Do You Have the January Blues?

Feeling down in the dumps now that the holidays are over? If you're hoping for something uplifting on these dreary days and cold nights, you're not alone. T.S. Eliot may have said in The Waste Land that "April is the cruelest month," but studies have found that for the majority of Americans January is the most depressing month of the year, with the 24th being the worst day.

You may have experienced several of the reasons for these negative feelings and behaviors yourself. Your eager anticipation for the holidays is over, possibly replaced by the realities of a celebration that didn't live up to your expectations. Your clothes are tight from the extra pounds you put on from parties and your sweet cravings. Your loved ones are gone and you're feeling disillusioned and lonely. The weather is dreary with little chance of a break for several months. By the end of the first week of January, one-third to one-half of you have already caved in on your New Year's resolutions, leaving you feeling disappointed and frustrated. The credit card bills have arrived and you realize you spent more than you had planned. And while you may not have noticed the short days and long nights in December because of all the holiday lights, now it is painfully obvious that winter is clearly here.

For some 10% to 20% of Americans, winter depression is exacerbated by SAD, Seasonal Affective Disorder, which is brought on by the reduction in sunlight and the brain's response to this underexposure. For Sandwiched Boomers, stressed between caring for growing children and aging parents, these extra pressures may be an even greater strain this month.

Tune in all week for tips to help you deal with the January gloom and focus on the opportunities open to you. And click on the post title above to take you to our website, www.HerMentorCenter.com, and the article, 6 Ways to Manage Common Unhappiness. It will give you some techniques to get started.

Positive Thinking and Holiday Peace in the Family

Focus on the positives during holiday time and see how that can affect peace in the family. Why not start practicing some of the following tips right now, in preparation for what's to come? Then scroll down to the bottom righthand corner of this post and let us know what works for you.

Consider what you love about your family and let them know how grateful you are they're a part of your life. Be sure to point out their positive qualities and personal strengths rather than focusing on the negatives.

You don't have to be all things to all people all the time. If your favorite aunt doesn't get along with her ex-husband's new wife, don't invite them to dinner. It will make it easier for everyone to have an open mind and an accepting heart.

Put aside differences and avoid hot button issues. Sibling rivalry and unfinished family business are bound to surface. Despite how hard it may be, go for the higher ground and walk away from misunderstandings. But agree to finish the conversation at a later time.

Conversely, with a relationship that matters to you, bury the hatchet. If in the past you have stifled your feelings and then blown up later, don't let your emotions fester. Admit the part you play in the conflict, privately, and deal with it.

If there is tension in the room, take the focus away from the specific toward the abstract. For example, talk about the value of apologizing for some wrongdoing. Then encourage others to discuss how this kind of quality has enhanced their other personal relationships.

Practice letting go of childhood pain and longings when family members are not with you in person but in your memories. And realize that having feelings of gratitude and forgiveness are a gift you give yourself.

You can click on the title of this post to read an article that has more tips about how the gift of connection can reduce holiday stress.

Keeping Peace in the Family during the Holidays

Media images of the holidays are often exaggerated and, before you know it, you're trying to conform to unrealistic ideals. Combined with the added pressures and demands on your time, this can lead to emotional overload. Just remember that nothing is perfect.

Now that the holiday season is swiftly approaching, perhaps you're worried that your dysfunctional family dynamics will surface as soon as you get together. Do you think that your mother's inquisitive nature may scare off the first boyfriend your daughter's had in years? Or that your new son-in-law's parents will wonder why your 35 year old son has moved back home again? Following the common sense strategies we'll be sharing, over the next several days, will help you create a more serene holiday season for you and your family:

Realize that the anticipatory anxiety you are experiencing is common. Financial burdens around gift giving and extra chores when entertaining can make you feel apprehensive and stressed. Accept this as a normal reaction.

Make sure that you have realistic expectations and don't take everything personally. Some family members may be struggling with financial, business or marital issues that have nothing to do with you.

Clicking on the title of this post will take you to www.HerMentorCenter.com and more tips about how to handle holiday stress.

Focus on Gratitude During the Holidays - and All Year

Deciding to focus on giving thanks means a whole new mindset. As Albert Schweitzer put it, "To educate yourself for the feeling of gratitude means to take nothing for granted, but to always seek out and value the kind that will stand behind the action. Train yourself never to put off the word or action for the expression of gratitude." When you follow these steps you can act on the gratitude you experience and live a rich life no matter what time of year or economic environment.

Positive psychology studies have shown that thinking about someone to whom you are grateful and conveying that gratitude increases your own well-being - you will feel less stress and depression and more happiness and pleasure in your lives and relationships. Expressions of gratitude give you a greater sense of purpose in life and more feelings of personal growth and sense of control. And you'll even get a better night's sleep! Not a bad thing for a Sandwiched Boomer, coping with the daily stresses of caring for aging parents and growing children.

Click on the post title above to give you some suggestions about unique gifts of yourself you can give your family this holiday season. You will be able to read our article, Celebrate the Holidays with the Gift of Time.

As we come to the end of the holiday week, hold on to the feelings that come from sharing good times with family and friends. And take in some final thoughts about how to care for yourself in tough times.

As Sandwiched Boomers, you may be wondering how you will pay college tuition for your children, help your parents on a fixed income and ever be able to retire. But while you can’t always control what happens, you can control how you deal with it. Your response to the financial crisis depends largely on your interpretation. The sense you make of it all is called ‘reframing.’ And here you do have a choice – either to imagine that circumstances will never change or that you can find a silver lining within the dark clouds.

So, for example, if you’re concerned about the impact on your family, remind yourself that families grow stronger when they weather challenges together. By acknowledging your feelings and thoughts and gently redirecting your attention to the positive, you decrease your stress. And when you’re not feeling so defeated, you'll make choices that will better maximize the opportunities ahead.

These are unprecedented times. With the breakdown of traditional financial institutions, the wildly fluctuating stock market, the Madoff ponzi scheme and government bailouts, Americans are confused about what to do. Some are in denial, not ready to grasp the problems and potential consequences. Others are angry at what they see as awarding recklessness on Wall Street. Still others are in a panic about what they've lost and the gloomy economic forecast. These are all common emotional reactions to loss. And for Sandwiched Boomers, many of whom are financially responsible for their growing children and aging parents, they’re scared as they watch their dreams of a comfortable retirement disappear.

Medical care companies report that mental heath calls due to financial pressure have increased over 100% in the past several months. Early signs of distress - sadness, irritability, lack of motivation and changes in sleeping or eating patterns - can be subtle and easily missed in a busy family. However, as the economic turmoil continues, there can be a snowball effect.

If you're spending time with your family over the holidays, notice how they're feeling emotionally. Talk together about what's going on. We'll be focusing this week on healthy strategies that will help you keep a positive attitude in these tough times.

This week we have highlighted 8 techniques to help you and your life partner remain faithful to each other. When you take the responsibility to incorporate these into your relationship, you increase the odds of being there for one another through the years. And it's nice to know that your brain function is hard wired to support you in these efforts to stay close to home. So, Sandwiched Boomers, follow the advice of the old idiom, "home is where the heart is," and re-affirm your love this holiday season.

We recently came across a site aimed at providing insights into relationships, www.3smartcubes.com. Click on the Relationship Quizzes section there for quizzes on romance that can help you identify problems in your relationships as well as find solutions to them. We have provided a link to their site under "Relationship Quizzes" in our listing of Links below.

We wish a Happy Hanukkah to those lighting the first candle this Sunday night. We hope the warmth of the candles and songs brings joy to your heart. And nothing but gimmels!

Even during the holiday rush, you can carve out some time just for your life partner. Attention is often the best gift you can give to those you love - and it won't strain your tightened budget. Here are some more tips for you Sandwiched Boomers.

Give compliments freely. Sometimes it seems easier to criticize and complain than to praise and acknowledge positive behavior. Adjust your antennae to be more attentive to the actions you want to reinforce. When you are thinking something nice, say it out loud to your partner.

Keep your communication open and honest. Talk out misunderstandings before they become full-fledged arguments. Use the same conversational etiquette with your spouse that you would with anyone else you care about and respect. Practice active listening skills and sending I-messages.

Use cooperation and compromise. Be flexible in resolving your conflicts. Remind yourself to look at the issue from your partner's perspective as well as from your own. Ask yourself if it is more important to be right and win the argument than to protect your relationship.

Sandwiched Boomers, what are you dreaming about this holiday season - universal goals like sustaining our planet's resources and gaining energy independence? Or, with the stock market meltdown, are you wishing for some relief from the financial pain? Even in the best of times, the stress that comes with the holidays this time of year can be exhausting. So why not give a gift to yourself?

Take some down time over the weekend. For a couple of hours each day, try not to focus on the problems. Curl up with a great book from the library, watch the ballgame with your teenagers, take your grandkids to the park.

Enjoy peace of mind by paying down your debts. Hold back from buying a lot of gifts or taking the family on an expensive outing. With your children, decide together how to spend a fun and relaxing day. Your family will understand and grow from the experience.

As Sandwiched Boomers in these challenging economic times, is the commercialism of the holidays getting you down? How would you like to spend less time racking up credit card debt and more time putting heart into your relationships? It is important to honor the tradition of giving. But the accumulation of stuff can't hold a candle to the gift that matters most. This year, recreate the joy of simpler days by giving the gift of connection to your family and friends.

Organize a potluck dinner. Enjoy time with your friends by inviting them over for an evening of fun. Ask them to bring their signature dish. Cut down on expenses by exchanging memories instead of gifts this year.

Create some of your holiday presents. Express yourself and add a personal touch by baking decorative cookies. Show others you care with an IOU to babysit while they have a much needed night out.

Think about the ways you give to others without breaking into your savings account. And let us know some of your ideas.

For Sandwiched Boomers, the financial debacle precipitated losses on many levels besides the stock market. And with the holidays just around the corner, the crisis in confidence couldn't have come at a worse time. This week our blog's focus is on how the gift of connection with family and friends can help reduce holiday stress.

Stress is the body's response to any stimulus - external or internal - perceived as taxing personal resources. Think about what's going on for you. Does food become your comfort and challenge, eating the cookie dough instead of baking it? Is gift giving your major source of stress, as you search for the best holiday bargains? At the annual office party, will you be busy at the buffet table instead of networking?

You may be creating more stress for yourself by sticking to old routine and operating on automatic pilot. Symptoms of stress can creep up on you or appear suddenly at any time. Notice if you're feeling the pressure in any of the following ways:

Physiological - headaches, stomach upset

Emotional - feeling irritated, overwhelmed

Behavioral - overeating, physical withdrawal

Cognitive - trouble concentrating, memory loss

Log on all week for tips to manage stress that don't cost you anything except time. And let us hear about some ideas that work for you.