Reduce Family Stress during the Holidays

Although the pictures you see are of Christmas trees, presents and smiling faces, there's a lot of chatter about the pressures on families during the holidays. How do you make this season as stress free as possible?

Try to understand what about the holidays is most significant to you and your family. And then decide to focus on what you want to do, not what you think you have to do. Begin to lay the groundwork for change in your family rituals.

Find emotional support. With the challenges of college kids coming home, integrating in-laws into the family and caring for aging parents, take a breather and call a friend. Share your feelings about what's going on in your family - get it off your chest and get some positive feedback.

Gratitude is a powerful emotion. Use it to your advantage. Point out your family's positive qualities rather than focusing on the negatives. Tell your loved ones what they mean to you. See their reaction and notice how it makes you feel.

Perhaps you don't have role models for repairing the family and have to make it up as you go along. Trust yourself in this process. Often the messiness of emotions leads to better understanding. Conflict can serve as an invitation to grow when you honor the importance of relationships. With family, there are no returns or exchanges even with a gift receipt. So embrace the holiday season and rejoice in the love and support of family.

Why not buy yourself a gift that costs less than a cup of coffee? At HerMentorCenter.com, you'll find an ebook Taking Control of Stress in a Financial Storm: Practical Strategies and Resources for Success that's full of simple strategies that help reduce stress.

http://www.hermentorcenter.com/order.html

Complimentary Ebook on How to Reach Your Goals

Perhaps there's a goal you've wanted to reach for a long time - start a small business, rekindle an old friendship, run a 5K?

When you think about working toward a goal and the inevitable changes that go along with that, you may wonder:

How do I access my strengths?
What can help me grow?
Who will I be then?

If you want answers to these questions, sign our email list to the left, just below this post. And accept these gifts from us - receive our free monthly email newsletter, Stepping Stones, and download our free Ebook, Courage and Lessons Learned: Reaching for Your Goals.

In this Ebook, you'll find stories about people whose names you probably recognize - Captain Sully Sullenberger, Susan Boyle, Senator Ted Kennedy - as well as practical tips about drawing on your own strengths to create the life you want. Try them on and see how they can work for you.

Conflict Resolution for Boomer Couples

Don't you already know there is no perfect relationship? All couples get angry and argue, so you're not alone. But remember, when resolving conflict, keep your words sweet - you may have to eat them. Your arguments may not have as much fallout if you and your partner accumulate positive reserve in your emotional bank account - that is, the more positive interactions and feelings, the less damage.

Agree to stop arguing and postpone a difficult conversation until you're both feeling less upset. Decide, together, to step away and put distance between you and the situation. Take a break and wait until you both are settled enough to listen to each other.

While you're unwinding, think more constructively - for example, his anger isn’t all about me; we really do love each other; she's under a lot of pressure at work; this too shall pass; I'm upset now but I know we’re right for each other.

Throw yourself into an activity that gives you immediate release and stay there for a while - call a friend and let off steam, take a long run in the park, put on earphones and listen to music that stirs your soul.

Distraction can be powerful, no matter what form it takes. Be playful and try humor or turn the controversy into a debate. Using adaptive defenses can lead to deeper and more meaningful conversations.

Practicing these strategies can make a difference in the outcome of your disagreements. As Russian writer Leo Tolstoy said, "What counts in making a happy marriage is not so much how compatible you are but how you deal with incompatibility."

Are you an entrepreneur or small business owner? In honor of Effective Communication Month, you can pick up tools to help you communicate better with your customers, clients and prospects - even your spouse! Although you do have to opt-in to get the free gifts of your choice, check out this giveaway to see if it works for you.

And remember to log on tomorrow for our Virtual Book Tour with Dr. Jed Diamond and his new book, "Mr. Mean." Come prepared with questions about the problems in your relationship - you'll receive smart and practical solutions from Jed.