What You Can Learn from President Obama's Mother-in-Law

Now that Michelle Obama's mother is living in the White House, will the cruel jokes and snide remarks about mothers-in-law finally stop? Will Marian Robinson, as first mother-in-law, be able to pave the way for acceptance, even respect, for this much-maligned branch of the family tree? Only time, and the nightly comedians, will tell.

If you have a new son-in-law yourself, you can use Mrs. Robinson and other successful in-laws as your guides. Let them teach you how to adjust to your new role. It's not easy. Once you've made the final payment for your daughter’s dream wedding, you may find yourself relegated to the back burner.

Instead of you, your daughter's new husband is now the one who shares her confidences. After spending the past couple of decades as an active and involved mom, do you now feel like a Lame Duck? Even more important, how can you learn to relate to the guy who is now the center of your daughter’s universe? Tune in this week for some tips to get you started with your own son-in-law.

In the meantime, if you have a new daughter-in-law, click on the title above to go to www.HerMentorCenter.com and read some tips about how to improve your relations with her.

Obama's Mother-in-law is Moving In

In this administration, with such a protective mom in chief, one major focus on the home-front will be the first daughters. The goal of these devoted parents is to help the girls find their way in their new environment. And Michelle's mom is moving in for now, to provide a constant presence and keep the girls grounded. When asked about the relationship with his mother-in-law, the president, among other things, said: "I don't tell my mother-in-law what to do." Doesn't it sound like our new president is off to a really good start?

What follows are some ideas that may help you and your family:

Look at your situation and decide what works for you. If you need some time by yourself, be sure to fit that into your plans. When you want to reconnect with your teenagers, plan outings that will appeal to both of you. If your parents are up to it, invite them on a family vacation. Your children will benefit from spending quality time with their grandparents. And it will give you free time and the chance for you and your partner to catch up without distractions.

Do what is necessary to maintain familiarity and continuity. If you nurture your family and stabilize their environment, they will feel more secure. The structure in their lives and the support you give them will relieve feelings of anxiety or stress. Children are resilient and, as you model positive thinking and hope, they will thrive. The rewards can be immeasurable for the whole family.

For additional tips, click on the title of this post and read our article, From Baby Boomer to Mother-in-Law: How to Play Your New Role.