Helping the Teens Who Admire Rihanna

Rihanna's situation has been tried in the court of public opinion. And it doesn't seem as if anyone is in favor of her taking Chris back. It must be hard for her to be a public face in private pain. But she is dealing with a reality that all teenagers need to be informed about – that physical and emotional abuse are dangerous. Rihanna has the platform to demonstrate the benefits of making smart choices. And she can act in her own best interests, for herself and all the young fans who admire her and continue to watch her every move.

Help your troubled teenagers feel better about themselves. As they work through their self esteem and dependency issues, they will make better decisions about their relationships. And by accepting the person they are becoming, they will be less afraid of being alone and more excited about what’s ahead in their future.

Your attitudes and behavior are a daily example for your growing children. Clicking on the title of this post will take you to www.HerMentorCenter.com and an article about how to nourish yourself.

Sandwiched Boomers and Support for their Teens

If you're a Sandwiched Boomer with concerns about your teen's relationship, what follows are ideas to talk about as you offer support:

Get the help you need now. Find an individual therapist or life coach who will guide you as you decide how to move forward. It's important to develop positive self-regard, confidence and the life skills for this. The therapy should focus on areas such as cognitive behavioral change, communication, anger management, stress reduction and control strategies. Stay in treatment as long as you need in order to figure out what to do.

Find perspective in order to grow. Whether you're hit in the face with a crisis, adjusting to changes in your identity or making a slow transition into the next chapter of your life, expect a cascade of feelings - anxiety, the desire to hold on, resentment, sadness, fear, eventually a sense of freedom. The emotional roller coaster ride is normal. If you have the fortitude to step back, take a deep breath and face the situation squarely, you can't help but grow from the challenges.

Click on the title above and read an article to learn more about how to protect yourself and your loved ones from physical or emotional abuse.

Teens Helping Each Other

We heard from a reader about a website that supports teen action. Check out www.dosomething.org/abuse, to see a video that's a response by teenagers to the Rihanna/Chris Brown problem.

The media continues to be on top of this issue and a spokeswoman on TV earlier this week sent a clear message to young people - this is about you and you need to separate the issue from the celebrities - look at the bigger picture. Violence is not normal or acceptable and you have to take responsibility for yourself.

As members of the sandwich generation, you've got your hands full. But take the time to turn your kids on to the website. Watch the video with them. Oprah Winfrey and president Obama are both strong advocates for informing and educating our youth. Click on the title above to read an article about Winfrey's support of Obama.

If your growing children are going through a rough time, help them recognize the value of support from others. Talking to friends and family can clarify their needs as they work through their feelings. Listening to a second or third objective opinion will provide them with further insight, direction and encouragement.

One in Three Teens will be in an Abusive Relationship

Rihanna is young, talented, and at the top of the musical charts. She's also a potential example for our youth. But first she has to heal herself. Oprah Winfrey suggested that Rihanna give it some time and get counseling. What follows are ideas that she could take to heart for herself - and as a spokeswoman for all of the young women and men who look up to her.

Take a step back and take care of yourself. You deserve time alone. And the chance to be safe - physically and emotionally. This will help you see your situation from a different angle. Listening to your inner voice can provide comfort and reassurance as you recognize your basic character strengths. Focus on what's important, as you integrate core values and personal ideals into how you want to live your life.

Explore your negative emotions. When trust is broken, if you or your partner have made bad decisions, there can be a buildup of frustration, anger or disappointment, even despair as you make efforts to adapt to the new reality. It may become apparent how much you've changed and how far apart the two of you have grown. And you'll see what steps to take next, for your own good.

Studies indicate that 1 in 3 teens will be in an abusive relationship at some point, and 80% will continue to date that person. These statistics are staggering. As members of the sandwich generation, share your ideas about how to keep our teenagers informed and safe.

How Rihanna can be a Positive Role Model for Teenagers

Are you a member of the sandwich generation with teenagers still living at home? If so, you may be helping them prepare emotionally to move out and be on their own. And in this day and age, with peer pressure and other distractions, that's not such an easy job.

Growing children today are caught in the crosshairs of modern media. Technology has become their babysitter – reality TV, nude photos on the Internet, bizarre videos on YouTube, seductive text messages. It's time for these young people to be exposed instead to role models who have the potential to inspire them to do the right thing. But instead of symbols of stability, they're finding other adolescents living through their own crises.

On the day of the Grammys, R&B singer Chris Brown allegedly beat up his girlfriend, pop star Rihanna, after an altercation over text messages that Brown received from another woman. Pundits, bloggers and reporters are weighing in. Some support Rihanna and are intent on not blaming the victim. Others want her to face the situation head-on and take a strong stand.

This week we're focusing on how Rihanna can help herself - and all the young people who admire her. Clicking on the title above will take you to www.HerMentorCenter.com and an article about domestic violence.