Family Relationships

Join other women in the sandwich generation - share ideas and solutions as you learn to nourish family relationships without starving yourself.

Monday, September 15, 2008

Now that summer is actually over, school has started and the political season is in full swing, we thought it would be refreshing to pause and look back over the Olympic Games to see what insights it can bring into your life as a Sandwiched Boomer.

This August, billions of fans watched athletes from around the world compete in the Beijing Olympics. Even with political controversy and global tensions running rampant, these diverse games reflected the delicate balance between reality and entertainment. For many Sandwiched Boomers, the Olympics satisfied the yearning for distraction from immediate concerns about economic instability and caring for a family-in-flux.

The Games provided color, drama and a broad demonstration of excellence. In addition to news about the winners and venues, information from Beijing went well beyond who was winning and losing gold medals. This week we will discuss lessons the Olympics can teach Baby Boomers and give you some tips about how to incorporate the deeper meaning of the Olympics into your life. So stay tuned.

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Friday, August 15, 2008

The first time ever, two U.S. women won gold and silver medals in the all-around individual gymnastics competition. For Nastia Liukin and Shawn Johnson - friends, competitors, teammates - it's been a long journey but their dream came true.

Valeri Liukin, Nastia's dad and coach, competed for the Soviet Union in the 1988 Seoul Olympics. Nastia faced her dad's gold medal every day when she woke up, giving her extra motivation: "Just to be able to see it, having it there in my room and knowing that in a few months I could have one of my own."

Liukin entered these Olympics in the shadow of her roommate in the Athletes' Village. Johnson, the current U.S.champion, got most of the attention and was favored to win the all-around. The pair anchored the U.S. team that took silver behind China's gold on Wednesday.

Liukin said she was not disappointed. But she and Johnson wanted more. They made a calendar to hang over their beds in the village, counting the days until they got their next chance for gold. They wanted to go all out and have fun. And the two pals managed to do both.

"I couldn't be any prouder of Nastia," Johnson said. "She deserved that gold medal. She's one of my best friends and we just want the best for each other."

The silver seemed to whet Johnson's appetite. She wants to try again at the Olympics in London. "I probably would have told you a month ago that I was done but, after being here and experiencing the Olympics, I'd give anything to feel that again. If I can in 2012, I'll be there."

And their advice to other aspiring athletes? Follow your heart, love what you do, work hard and have fun. An excellent exercise for all of us - so stretch into that.

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Thursday, August 14, 2008

It has been three months since the 7.8 earthquake that devastated the Sichuan province of China, killing 70,000 people, injuring 375,000 and leaving more than 5 million homeless. Over 7,000 classrooms were destroyed and close to 10,000 children died in the tragedy. With the one child rule in China, there was an outpouring of grief as many families lost their only child.

In the opening ceremony of the summer games, 9-year old Lin Hao, accompanying flag bearer Yao Ming, represented hope for the Chinese poeple. Lin Hao was a student at the Yuzixi Primary School in quake-epicenter, Wenchuan County. He not only survived the earthquake but, after getting out of his classroom, went back into the rubble to pull two classmates to safety. During his rescue he was hit by falling rubble and suffered a head injury. And while waiting for help, he encouraged his classmates to sing, to keep their spirits up. When he was asked why he risked his life, he said that he was the hall monitor and it was his job to look after his classmates.

One of our readers commented that the most important lesson the Bejing Olympics can teach us is to be a good sport, a gracious loser and a generous winner. Although Lin Hao is not an olympian - at least not yet - his heroism makes a grieving country proud and, while still mourning, allows all of China to enjoy the celebration.

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Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Todd and Barbara Bachman, whose daughter Elisabeth "Wiz" McCutcheon was a member of the U.S. women's volleyball team in the Athens summer games, were quintessential supporters of the sport. The first day of the Beijing Olympics, Todd died of a stabbing and Barbara was seriously injured by an attacker who tried to rob them and then committed suicide by jumping from the balcony of the ancient Drum Tower.

Elizabeth, a 2004 volleyball gold medalist, is married to the U.S. men's volleyball coach, Hugh McCutcheon. His first thought, when hearing the news of his in-laws, was how to get to his wife. As a coach at the Olympics, as well as a son-in-law, there was no question about what to do in the face of such a tragedy. His response was what others expected of him: "volleyball is my job, my family is my life." He left to support and comfort his wife.

McCutcheon did not return to work and chase what could have been an even more meaningful gold medal. But he phoned his team before the first game. Hearing Hugh's voice and getting leadership from him meant a lot to the players. And the volleyball community that loved the Bachmans rallied. The men's team took the floor with the victims' initials written on the backs of their shoes and said a silent prayer in memory of Todd Bachman. In a match that was much tougher than it should have been, the U.S. men's volleyball team won what turned out to be a bitter-sweet victory.

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Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Emotional support is a major theme for Sandwiched Boomers. And today we salute the parents who are at the Beijing Olympics, watching their emerging adult children spread their wings as they compete. With 3 gold medals and 3 world records under his belt already, everyone is talking about Michael Phelps. On the Today show, his mother and sisters discussed the roller coaster ride - the ups and downs, the pressure, the racing hearts, and then the ultimate excitement. His mother described the pool as Michael's office and knows that he's working to perform at his highest level.

The Phelps family epitomizes all families. What are your dreams and who are your heroes? How are you taking each race as it comes? What kind of support are you giving? And how are you pulling for your kids so that they're free to give the best performance that they can?

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Monday, August 11, 2008

The anticipation of the Beijing Olympics has been palpable - and the spectacular opening ceremonies, at the impressive Bird's Nest, proved it was well worth the wait. The ideals of the summer games are represented by Lopez Lomong, elected by his teammates to be the the United States flag bearer. One of the Lost Boys of Sudan, he was not only rescued from a Kenyan refugee camp by a United Nations program, but also qualified for the U.S. team in the 1,500 meter race.

What a story - personified in the host country, China, which has been strongly criticized for its record on human rights. One of the key concerns has been the war torn Darfur region of Lomong's home, Sudan. Lomong joined Team Darfur, a group formed to raise awareness of perceived abuses, yet says he's an ambassador of the U.S., not the government. He's walking on eggshells and showing his character, sending a message as an athlete from Sudan: "I am worried about the kids who are dying in Darfur, kids who don't have the dream they could be good athletes or Olympians or doctors, because they will be running away from their villages separated from their families." His greatest hope is to inspire young kids around the world, like he was. And that, in large measure, is what these games are about.

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