Revisiting the Courage of Captain Sully Sullenberger

As members of the sandwich generation, you may have your hands full with the challenges of parents growing older and kids growing up. But that's no reason to neglect what you need.

Perhaps there's a goal you've wanted to reach for a long time - start a small business, rekindle an old friendship, run a 5K? When you think about working toward a goal and the inevitable changes that go along with that, you may wonder: How do I access my strengths? What can help me grow? Who will I be then?

There are a lot of people we can look to who have had the courage to reach deep inside and make something happen. Take, for example, Captain Chesley (Sully) Sullenberger, the pilot who landed the passenger jet on the Hudson River. Bravery and humility - often at the heart of fairy tales - are qualities that can inspire all of us to be the best that we can be. And, with the doom and gloom of the economic crisis, we want to feel hopeful again.

Learn to be as prepared as possible ahead of time. Sullenberger was ready. He's a former air force fighter pilot, an expert in safety reliability methods and has 40 years of flying experience. Although you may not need training for an emergency landing, you can become equipped for what lies ahead. If you're making an important presentation at work, setting guidelines for your kidult who can't find a job and is moving back home or talking to your dad about giving up the car keys, learn as much as you can about the issues. Research the subject, write out talking points and get feedback from those whose opinions you value.

This week on the blog we'll be writing short vignettes about people whose names you probably recognize. In their stories, you’ll find practical tips about drawing on your own strengths to create the life you want. Try on these strategies and see how they can work for you.

If you want to read more about Captain Sullenberger and his remarkable act of courage, sign the email list to the left of this post and download our free ebook, Courage and Lessons Learned. And if you would like to stay in touch with him, you can follow Sully on his Facebook page.

Resiliency in Difficult Times

Do you feel inundated by bad news coming at you from all sides? The oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico is spreading and the gushing thousands of feet below the surface has yet to be fully contained; new unemployment figures in the U.S. confirm the dismal private sector job creation that continues to lag; international conflicts rage and at home citizens are divided about immigrants' rights. World news reflects the tensions you may be feeling in your own relationships. How do you deal with the challenges coming from the rich but often problematic complexity of your family life? Here are some tips for you:

Draw upon your own strength. You will learn more about your capabilities when you are tested by hard times than when everything is going well for you. Resiliency is increased each time you get up and put one foot in front of the other. Bravery comes in many actions - facing an illness, providing for your family, starting a new career - not only on the battlefield. To learn more about identifying your Character Strengths, visit the Authentic Happpiness website and take the VIA Survey of Character Strengths. Use the ones that seem to define you - Signature Strengths - to support your progress through tough times.

Just as those in the foxholes feel the honest emotions of fear, anger, pain, guilt, anxiety and loneliness, allow yourself to experience these emotions when they are a part of your life.

Especially if you are a Sandwiched Boomer, it's easy to become overwhelmed by all you have on your plate. Torn between caring for your growing children and aging parents, it's normal to feel stressed and anxious at times. Don't blame yourself. Once you are able to acknowledge these feelings, then you can begin the long process of coping with them.

If you remember the fragility and transience of life as you move through it, you will savor each good moment you have. Integrate and reflect on all you have achieved in balancing your work and family with your own needs. Living your life to the fullest is a lasting mark of respect you can pay to your family and to the veterans you honored this week who have sacrificed the innocence of their youth for you.

For some role models of courage, look to the left of this post. When you sign up for our monthly newsletter, Stepping Stones, you will receive a link to a complimentary copy of our ebook, Courage and Lessons Learned. There you'll find stories of resiliency and practical strategies for success in difficult times.

Connect with Your Family This Summer

Now that Memorial Day is past and school will soon be over, have you thought about how to use those extra summer hours to connect with your family?

With the summer season now unofficially open and the barbeque back in service, can we still learn from the heroes we honored on Memorial Day who have served and given their all to protect our way of life? As we respect their unique bravery, we can direct their lessons to our own family situation and apply the same principles to those closest to us.

Express the gratitude you feel for what they have given you - protection, opportunities, love, strength, enjoyment of life. You have doors open to you now because of them. This can begin with something as simple as a heartfelt "thank you," and develop into a more textured and thoughtful recognition of what you are thankful for. Find out more about the benefits of expressing gratitude through the Authentic Happiness website

Recognize the importance of revealing the love you have for each other. Those who have been in harm's way know the meaning of the words, "it's too late." Don't put off sharing your love; decide to make it a priority. Each day, acknowledge those you love, and who love you, as if it were your last.

Understand the value of friendship. Those in the service have trusted and leaned on each other as they've shared their experiences and relied on their camaraderie. Know that we are here to take care of our friends and family - close and extended - difficult though it may be at times.

Community support is there for the taking when you know where to look and how to ask for it. Be open to the reality that you might need to utilize the input and generosity of others. You are not diminished when you allow another to help you.

Are you looking for some ideas about how to connect and have a special family vacation this summer? Even Sandwiched Boomers can relax and enjoy time with extended family if you plan ahead. This summer, create memories to carry you and your family through the rest of the year. And log in to share your ideas about family togetherness.

To read stories of modern day heroes and how they coped with challenges in their lives, click on the link to the left. You can sign up for our monthly newsletter, Stepping Stones, and receive a complimentary copy of our ebook, Courage and Lessons Learned, which showcases tips and strategies to use in your own family.

Fort Hood Massacre

Flags are flying at half-mast all across America in memory of the 13 soldiers who were massacred by Major Nidal Hasan at Fort Hood. The soldiers were randomly shot while they waited for medical treatment on the base. In addition to the 13 who died, 30 more were injured, some severely. The incident has brought to the forefront, less than a week before Veterans Day, the risk that those brave men and women in the armed forces take, in service to the country.

Americans in the armed forces continue to serve in Iraq and Afghanistan as well as other theaters throughout the world. While most of those killed and injured at Fort Hood were young, the average age of men and women in the Armed Forces has risen. Many in the service now are a part of the Sandwich Generation, concerned about caring for family members at home as they continue their duty to the country. Their burden becomes especially apparent as we approach Veterans Day, a time for all of us to pay tribute to American veterans of all wars.

What lessons can Sandwiched Boomers take from veterans - those who have stood up for the rest of us and given their all to protect our way of life? As we respect their unique bravery, we can direct what we learn to our own family situation. Between now and Veterans Day, we will look at how to apply the same principles to those closest to us. For some ideas about paying tribute to Veterans and your own family from www.HerMentorCenter.com, click on the post title above.

Honoring Our Fallen Soldiers on Memorial Day

We respectfully remember today those who have fallen in service to our country, those who have served and returned, and those who are currently in harm's way in our defense. Please join as we express our gratitude to these brave young men and women.

To read about how observances of Memorial Day and Veterans Day can positively impact you and your family relationships, please click on the title above.

Cheers for Captain Phillips and his Rescuers

We were thankful and joyous on Sunday to learn of the successful rescue of Richard Phillips, captain of the Maersk Alabama, a commercial ship bringing much-needed food and supplies to Africa. Capt. Phillips acted heroically when his ship was attacked by Somali pirates five days ago, surrendering himself as a hostage while protecting the crew from a similar fate. President Obama noted that Captain Phillips' demonstration of courage was "a model for all Americans." We certainly do join in admiring his unique combination of integrity, professional training and bravery.

Back on the USS Bainbridge, with Commander Frank Castellano, Capt. Phillips was quick to give credit to his rescuers, U.S. Navy Seals, saying, "I'm just the byline. The real heroes are the Navy, the Seals, those who have brought me home." The admirable behavior of many throughout this ordeal made the daring rescue possible: Capt. Phillips himself, the Navy Seals, Cmdr. Castellano, the officers and crew of the Alabama, the other U.S. Navy personnel and ships coming to aid in the rescue efforts. We wonder, what gives someone the strength to act as selflessly as Capt. Phillips did? His merchant marine training and position as a leader certainly played a large role, yet his actions also seem to reflect a deep personal commitment to his fellow man. We salute you, Captain Phillips, and welcome you home.

Earlier this year, we were awed by another hero, Captain Sullenberger, who landed his severely damaged plane in the Hudson with no loss of life. Click on the title above to take you to www.HerMentorCenter.com and our article, Captain Sullenberger: Heroes and Lessons Learned, to help you develop tools you can use when facing your own difficult situations. And visit us here all week as we look at how to incorporate Capt. Phillips' heroism and his rescuers' successful techniques into your own lives.

Captain Sullenberger and a Need for Heroes

Bravery and humility - often at the heart of fairy tales – are qualities that can inspire all of us to be the best that we can be. And, with the doom and gloom of the economic crisis, we were primed and about ready for a miracle. People want to feel hopeful again.

Chesley B. "Sully" Sullenberger III safely landed a US Airways flight 1549 with 155 passengers and crew onboard in the Hudson River when the plane encountered problems after takeoff. Everyone survived. A spokesman for the U.S. Airline Pilots Association says that Sullenberger acted 'very calm and cool, very relaxed, just very professional.' Apparently he was the last one off the plane, walking down the aisles two times to make sure no one was left on board. Now that's a hero.

It has been three months since the 7.8 earthquake that devastated the Sichuan province of China, killing 70,000 people, injuring 375,000 and leaving more than 5 million homeless. Over 7,000 classrooms were destroyed and close to 10,000 children died in the tragedy. With the one child rule in China, there was an outpouring of grief as many families lost their only child.

In the opening ceremony of the summer games, 9-year old Lin Hao, accompanying flag bearer Yao Ming, represented hope for the Chinese poeple. Lin Hao was a student at the Yuzixi Primary School in quake-epicenter, Wenchuan County. He not only survived the earthquake but, after getting out of his classroom, went back into the rubble to pull two classmates to safety. During his rescue he was hit by falling rubble and suffered a head injury. And while waiting for help, he encouraged his classmates to sing, to keep their spirits up. When he was asked why he risked his life, he said that he was the hall monitor and it was his job to look after his classmates.

One of our readers commented that the most important lesson the Bejing Olympics can teach us is to be a good sport, a gracious loser and a generous winner. Although Lin Hao is not an olympian - at least not yet - his heroism makes a grieving country proud and, while still mourning, allows all of China to enjoy the celebration.