Heroes in Your Family

With Memorial Day commemorated earlier this week, the summer season is now unofficially open - the barbeque is back in service at home and families are beginning their annual trips to the beach. Yet even with the shift to summer fun, there are still lessons we can take from the combat veterans we honored on Memorial Day. As we respect their unique bravery and reflect on the ideals of service, courage and camaraderie, we can apply these principles to those closest to us.

If you're a Sandwiched Boomer, stressed by the responsibilities of caring for aging parents and growing children, you may feel like there's no time to step back and take a deep breath. When you do, here are some things to keep in mind as you enrich your family relationships:

Recognize the importance of revealing the love you have for each other. Those who have been in harm's way know the meaning of the words, "it's too late." Don't put off sharing your love; decide to make it a priority. Each day, acknowledge those you love, and who love you, as if it were your last. The joy you create and receive in your close relationships can sustain you through hard times. You can find out more about the value of these positive connections on the Authentic Happiness website.

Express the gratitude you feel for what your family has given you - protection, opportunities, love, strength, enjoyment of life. You have doors open to you now because of them. This can begin with something as simple as a heartfelt "thank you," and develop into a more textured and thoughtful recognition of what you are grateful for. Begin by taking the steps to express your gratitude - it benefits both you and the loved ones you single out to thank.

Understand the value of friendship. Those in the Service have trusted and leaned on each other as they've shared their experiences and relied on their camaraderie. Know that we are here to take care of our friends and family - close and extended - difficult though it may be at times. Friendship is the gift we give ourselves and each other. It helps each of us achieve a longer, healthier, and more satisfying life.

Community support is there for the taking when you know how to ask for it. On Monday, we highlighted organizations providing support to Servicemen and -women. Be open to the reality that you too might need to utilize the input and generosity of others. You are not diminished when you allow another to help you.

To read stories of modern day heroes and how they coped with challenges in their lives, click on the email list box to the left. You can sign up there for our monthly newsletter, Stepping Stones, and receive a complimentary copy of our ebook, Courage and Lessons Learned, which showcases tips and strategies to use in your own family.

Susan Boyle and 'I Dreamed a Dream'

Last week we all had a chance to learn a lesson from Susan Boyle when she sang 'I Dreamed a Dream' before judges in the trials of 'Britain has Talent.' What a surreal and thrilling moment for her. And what a wake-up call for the rest of us.

Her 15 minutes of fame aren't over yet with, so far, over 20 million views on YouTube. Why the viral nature of this phenomenon? Of course we're all pretty fed up with the media focus on teen pop stars and desperate for some good news or a heartfelt story. But is it that we're really looking for a role model whose character inspires us to follow our dreams?

In some ways Susan Boyle is everywoman. Her initial appearance onstage, with the negative reaction from the audience and judges, taps into insecurities we all have. Who hasn't felt frumpy or unattractive, unsure of ourselves or at a loss for words? Susan has lived a simple life and didn't expect to be so popular. She has been busy caring for her elderly mother and practicing her music. It makes you wonder, has our society been focused on the wrong things?

Tune in all week as we discuss the values and character strengths that can lead to personal success. And weigh in with your own ideas. In the meantime, click on the title above and read an article about Captain Sullenberger and what makes a hero.

Real Heroes Say Thank You

Somali pirates have vowed to attack other American ships and have tried to take over the Liberty Sun, only to be rebuffed by their crew. Secretary Gates believes that the US does not need to institute any new efforts to thwart future attacks. What do you think?

The crew of the Maersk Alabama arrived home to cheers today with Captain Phillips to follow soon. Let's look again at some of his heroic behavior that can inspire you.

Align yourself with a higher purpose. For Capt. Phillips, it was more important to protect his crew and their humanitarian cargo than himself. His altruistic perspective informed and directed his actions. You can build a meaningful life for yourself and your family as you form a strong connection to community, country, the world and spiritual power.

Say thank you. Capt. Phillips' first public statement upon reaching the USS Bainbridge was to thank his rescuers for giving him back his freedom. He tried to direct the spotlight away from him and towards them, labeling them the "real heroes" rather than himself. When you have been helped and nurtured by others in your quests, expressing your gratitude to them makes both you and they feel good. These two little words create a win-win situation for everyone.

Click on the title above to take you to our article, 5 Steps to Gratitude Despite a Tough Economy. It will help you learn how to express your gratitude.

Cheers for Captain Phillips and his Rescuers

We were thankful and joyous on Sunday to learn of the successful rescue of Richard Phillips, captain of the Maersk Alabama, a commercial ship bringing much-needed food and supplies to Africa. Capt. Phillips acted heroically when his ship was attacked by Somali pirates five days ago, surrendering himself as a hostage while protecting the crew from a similar fate. President Obama noted that Captain Phillips' demonstration of courage was "a model for all Americans." We certainly do join in admiring his unique combination of integrity, professional training and bravery.

Back on the USS Bainbridge, with Commander Frank Castellano, Capt. Phillips was quick to give credit to his rescuers, U.S. Navy Seals, saying, "I'm just the byline. The real heroes are the Navy, the Seals, those who have brought me home." The admirable behavior of many throughout this ordeal made the daring rescue possible: Capt. Phillips himself, the Navy Seals, Cmdr. Castellano, the officers and crew of the Alabama, the other U.S. Navy personnel and ships coming to aid in the rescue efforts. We wonder, what gives someone the strength to act as selflessly as Capt. Phillips did? His merchant marine training and position as a leader certainly played a large role, yet his actions also seem to reflect a deep personal commitment to his fellow man. We salute you, Captain Phillips, and welcome you home.

Earlier this year, we were awed by another hero, Captain Sullenberger, who landed his severely damaged plane in the Hudson with no loss of life. Click on the title above to take you to www.HerMentorCenter.com and our article, Captain Sullenberger: Heroes and Lessons Learned, to help you develop tools you can use when facing your own difficult situations. And visit us here all week as we look at how to incorporate Capt. Phillips' heroism and his rescuers' successful techniques into your own lives.

Creating Accountability

We all need role models to inspire us, but our culture seems to glorify the cowboy mentality of individuals acting in their own selfish interests. Celebrities' destructive behavior is condoned and mimicked. How can we get through to our children when the voices from the media are so loud? Don't throw in the towel. If you can plant the seeds, perhaps they will come to fruition when you least expect. Here are some ideas to talk about with your kids - maybe some even sound like the conversations your own parents had with you growing up:

Remember that the sun doesn't rise and set only on you. When you think solely about yourself, you deny the existence of other perspectives. Instead, consider the situation from the other person's viewpoint as well as your own. When your actions are harmful to them, weigh that effect in the balance.

Develop values that honor and respect your community. You belong to a larger network around you that is affected by what you do. Loyalty and social responsibility build connections that strengthen you as well as society. For many, spirituality and religiosity create a feeling of transcendence and purpose that helps maintain these bonds.

Click on the title above to read an article on our website about the heroes who serve our country in the armed services, How Observing Veterans Day Can Resonate for the Sandwich Generation. Tomorrow we'll look at more life lessons.