The Sandwich Generation: Preparing for the Holidays

The economic struggles and crisis in confidence have lasted far too long. And the hardships are particularly evident during the holiday season. Are you feeling stretched by the financial pressure? If you're facing tough buying decisions, the responsibilities of the holidays may even be getting you down. These are challenging times for the Sandwich Generation.

This year you may just have to let go of the idea of a perfect Christmas, Hanukah or Kwanzaa.

Photo courtesy of Asnat - Flickr.com

Even though it's important to honor the tradition of giving, the accumulation of material things can't hold a candle to the gift that matters most. Bringing cheer to others is a great way to cheer you up as well. And you can do it without breaking into your savings account. With the holidays fast approaching, you certainly don't want to add more pressure to your life. So follow these ideas to keep stress in check as you focus on more joy and less stuff:

Give the gift of connection. Put more heart in your relationships. Arrange a regular weekly date with your parents. Invite them to lunch, a museum or the movies. Send a card to an old friend with whom you've lost contact. Enclose a recent family photo, your email address and a promise to keep in touch. Drive an elderly neighbor to the grocery store, a doctor's appointment or the library.

Give to a worthy cause. Get the family or a group of friends together and spend a couple of hours helping out at a homeless shelter. Pass forward gifts you've received or bring some hardly used toys and clothes. Buy a small present for a homeless person you regularly pass on the street and make eye contact when you give it. Put a big smile on your face and help cook Christmas dinner at a soup kitchen. Make a donation to Aunt Mary's favorite charity; every gift counts no matter how much you spend.

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Creating a Holiday Spirit Yourself

If you're newly alone this year, the holidays may remind you of the joys and sorrows of past gatherings. But try to stay focused in the present. Let go of your expectations and instead create celebrations that are meaningful to you now. You'll find your experience of these special days can create new memories to savor throughout the year.

Image: Stuart Miles / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Now that you've used Monday's tips to get started, here are some more for coping with the holidays on your own:

Consider your finances. You'll need to budget differently this year so consider what holiday expenses you can reduce. Perhaps you and your friends can agree to forgo your usual gift giving and instead exchange homemade treats or enjoy a potluck dinner together. With the continuing tough economy, it's likely they're also looking for ways to cut back on costs.

Create new rituals. Plan to do something different for the holidays this year. There's really not one perfect way to celebrate so change your usual routine and enjoy the excitement of new experiences. Perhaps arrange to get away from home - visit a friend, volunteer in your community, go for a hike, travel nearby. Next year, you can choose to continue with the ones that worked the best for you.

Include others who are alone. You're not the only one whose celebration may be bittersweet this year. Share your holiday by Inviting a single friend or relative into your home or volunteering at a community soup kitchen. When you're making your own holiday preparations, set aside some time for those outside your circle. You can donate toys and books to needy children, cookies to a homeless shelter, music to a nursing home.

As you map out your new strategy for the holidays this year, are you also thinking about other changes you want to make? If you're looking for practical tips that help you take the first steps toward a new goal - running a 5K, starting your own business, reconnecting with an old friend - download our complementary ebook, Courage and Lessons Learned: Reaching for Your Goals. You'll find role models and suggestions there to help you prepare and execute your plans.

Celebrating the Holidays Without a Partner

Now that Thanksgiving is over, many have 'officially' moved into the holiday season. Are you alone and wondering how you'll be celebrating this year? Whether you're divorced or widowed, a single parent or the spouse of a deployed serviceperson, it may have seemed easier when you had a partner to share in the planning. Now that you'll be the one creating the holiday mood, you're likely to feel extra pressures, especially if you have children who are depending on you.

Image: Ambro / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

You can take advantage of the freedom you have to develop customs that are just right for you and your family. Here are some tips to give you a head start, even before December begins:

Recognize that it won't be easy. You may be feeling vulnerable and out of sorts after everything that has happened. Accept your complex emotions and acknowledge that it may difficult for you to enjoy the holidays as much as before. You can relieve some of your inner stress when you don't expect too much of yourself.

Take the process one step at a time. Holidays are stressful and this year won't be any different so try not to get overwhelmed. Do what you can without putting extra pressure on yourself. Set aside some time to relax and enjoy what the season means to you.

Look for support. Friends can throw you a lifeline as you adjust to your new status. And your extended family will help fill in the gaps created by your missing partner. If you have children, the more adults providing loving support, the easier it will be for them.

Check back on Wednesday for more tips to help you manage on your own. And in the meantime, take advantage of our holiday gift to you - download our ebook, free of charge, Taking Control of Stress in a Financial Storm: Practical Strategies and Resources for Success. You'll find more tips for negotiating the tough economic climate, today and throughout the holiday season.

This Holiday Season, Take Care of your Family AND Yourself

Try taking care of yourself during the holidays and you'll be pleasantly surprised as your stress level goes down. And even with a more relaxed frame of mind, everything will still fall into place. Be a role model and teach by example - slow down your pace and do something for yourself as you work hard to make the holidays special for your family.

If you feel ready to pass the baton to the younger generation, do it. Next year you can encourage and support your kidults as they preserve the old family traditions and create new holiday customs of their own. You'll see that cheering from the sidelines is good for everyone.

In the midst of taking care of your family's needs during this hectic season, continue to pay attention to your own wellbeing. Arrange to plan ahead and, when they offer, accept help from others. And try to include fun and laughter in all that you do. During the holidays, while you may wish for peace on earth and peace in your family, don't overlook the importance of your own peace of mind.

If you click on the title of this post, you can read an article about how to celebrate the holidays with the gift of time.

Log on to the blog tomorrow, anytime, for our Virtual Book Tour – we'll be interviewing Dr. Carol Orsborn, senior strategist for www.VibrantNation.com, about her book, "The Year I Saved My (Downsized) Soul."

This has been a year of uncertainty, upheaval and change. And this holiday season, especially, is a time to reflect on what you are thankful for and to count your blessings.

Instead of focusing on presents, be present. As you spend time with loved ones, cherish your family traditions. Enjoy the gift of time together and connection.

They say time flies when you're having fun, and we have had the best year - thanks to you, our readers. We appreciate your inspiration and having you as a part of our blogging family. Whether it's Christmas, Hanukah or Kwanzaa you're celebrating, have a great holiday!

This season, with all the problems facing our country, Sandwiched Boomers may have to let go of the idea of a perfect holiday. But that's not so bad. Even though you may be stretched financially, it always feels good to be able to give of yourself. And you know there are plenty of others much worse off, right?

Volunteer at a place that could really use your help. Get the family or a group of friends together and spend a few hours at a homeless shelter. Bring some toys or warm clothes that are in good shape, and a big smile on your face.

Small changes can represent a new beginning. The holidays don't have to look like a Norman Rockwell painting. Take heart as you give a little that feels like a lot. And in these hard times, that's a good lesson for all of us.

As a member of the Sandwich Generation you have a lot on your plate. And with the holiday season fast approaching, you don't want to increase your stress level. Think about what is most important to you about the holidays. The challenge is to keep some balance in your life and still honor Christmas, Hanukah or Kwanzaa.

Begin to lay the groundwork for change in your gift giving rituals. Follow these practical tips to help keep stress in check as you focus on more joy and less stuff:

Give the gift of reconnection. Send a card to someone with whom you've lost contact. Enclose a recent family photo and your email address.

Invest time instead of money. Drive an elderly neighbor to the grocery store, a doctor's appointment or the shopping mall.

Give the gift of yourself. Arrange a regular date with your parents. Invite them to lunch, a museum or the movies.

It's when life is challenging that support and connection mean the most. Bringing cheer to others is a good way to cheer up. And what better time than during the holidays?